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Larry’s Losers in the SEC – Week 5 – 2013

This week has two showdowns that will mean a lot down the road.

Larry’s Losers in the SEC – Week 5 – 2013

A motley looking bunch at best.

By: Larry Burton

Last week Old Bacardi the Wonder Dog and I flirted with another week of perfection but the boys over in Swine City couldn’t get their Hogs to hang on to a lead. So the eight out of nine record from this week brings our total to 37-4 and while we are shooting for something higher than that 90%, for now we’ll take our lumps and move on.

There are some games this week that will certainly have an effect on the SEC race so set your DVR’s to watch as many as you can and get to the grocery store to load up on those game time snacks. It’s gonna be a great weekend in the SEC.

Starting in the East

Florida at Kentucky – Muschamp’s mud puppies are headed to the Bluegrass State to take on that state’s Mildcats. This is the first of three weeks of butt whippings for the over matched Kentucky Kitties as they have South Carolina and Alabama up next.

Now Florida still has designs on the the SEC East and they’re not about to let the worst team in the SEC trip them up. If Stoops can last four more seasons, he may rake in some recruits that get them out of the cellar, but that’s not this year and it’ll only be fun to how bad a beating it’s going to be.

Larry’s Loser – Kentucky

The Gators didn’t prove to be nice guests to invite to Kentucky, but the Gators liked the Mildcats just fine.

LSU at Georgia – Over the past few years, Georgia has benefited greatly from having LSU whip up on South Carolina after the Gamecocks whipped on the Bulldogs. That helped get them into the SEC Championship game the last two years in a row.

Now they have to deal with the Tigers themselves and it’s sure to be a doozie. LSU and Georgia both have designs on an SEC Championship game and both teams can win this game depending who has the hot hand. Georgia always seem to come up just a bit short in big games and one win finally over South Carolina hasn’t removed the choke label from Aaron Murray and that is the main reason we went the way we did even though we know it could go either way.

Larry’s Loser – Georgia

Arkansas State at Missouri – The Red Wolves for the warm springs state didn’t fare to well with their first meeting with an SEC team as Auburn clawed them up 38-9 and they’re not likely to get a warmer welcome when they visit Pinkel’s pussycats at Missouri.

It’s a very inaccurate way of gauging which team is best by using common opponents, but it will be interesting to see if the Tigers from Missouri can claw up the Red Wolves as well as Auburn did and since they don’t play each other this season, this is as close it gets knowing which Tiger is best.

Larry’s Loser – Arkansas State

The Red Wolves had hoped for a kinder, gentler Tiger to show them lots of warmth and good sportsmanship, instead they got mauled.

South Carolina at University of Central Florida – Steve Spurrier flies his feathered flock to Florida to try and knock out a Knight on his home turf. But head coach George O’Leary has his boys believing that they can take on one of the SEC’s best.

It really wouldn’t too crazy to see a scenario where the Knights could pull off the upset here, but Bacardi the Wonder Dog doesn’t see that happening and while they may be Gamecocks, the cluckers from Carolina won’t lay an egg in this game.

Larry’s Loser – UCF

South Alabama at Tennesse – Head coach Joey Jones knows something about playing and beating Tennessee, but this time it won’t be as a member of the Crimson Tide. He’s bringing his Jaguars from South Alabama up to Hardknoxville to see if he can catch a Vol still reeling from getting their hind quarters chomped by a big old Gator last week.

But this week is validation for the Vols as they work up another win on the way to getting back to Vol days of old. We don’t know how long that’s gonna take, but after this game they’ll be one step closer.

Larry’s Loser – South Alabama

UAB at Vanderbilt – The baby Bama boys go North to Song City and hope to catch the Commodores asleep at the wheel and take home a win. But head coach James Franklin isn’t about to let “Bama Lite” come in here and upset their chances to continue their bowl streak.

So it’s a great weekend to see a slaughter and be a Commodore fan in Nashville this weekend and if you’re a UAB fan, it’s a great weekend to go on vacation and be away from the T.V.

Larry’s Loser – Vanderbilt? No UAB….

Vanderbilt didn’t just kick butt, but they took names too!

Now for the West

Ole Miss at Alabama – This winter while the pigskin pickin’ pooch and I were studying the teams and schedules, this was a game that made the hair on Bacardi’s back stand up and my instincts see this too as the trap game for Bama.

Head coach Hugh Freeze has these Rebels getting closer to SEC elite status all the time and they’re coming into this game to prove they’re there already. It’s up to Nick Saban to make sure his boys aren’t looking ahead and putting Ole Miss on their creme puff list, because if they do, they’re liable to get licked.

Larry’s Loser – Ole Miss

For the first three weeks they played like Grizzlies, but when faced with an elephant they couldn’t get up a tree fast enough.

Texas A&M at Arkansas – The Aggies have had some pretty smooth sailing once they got past the powerful Pachyderms from down Bama way and they are hoping that they can still find a way to work back into the SEC race. So these agricultural adventurers are about to abscond Arkansas’ chance to win this game and head on back to Texas with yet another SEC win.

If the Hogs thought they had their hands full last week with a bunch of rusty Knights in armor, they’re going be up to their curly tails this week in trouble as they try and stop Johnny Signature and the boys from Aggieland.

Larry’s Loser – Arkansas

The Hog’s dreams of SEC glory was all washed away like this Hog fan’s body paint.

Auburn has the week off and they’ll need it to get ready for Ole Miss next week.

Mississippi State also has the week off and they’ll surely need an extra week to get ready for LSU.

And with all the SEC on SEC action, there’s lots of room for old Bacardi the Wonder Dog and I to bet on some boneheads that don’t deliver as we hope they will, so we can’t wait to see how this week will go.

Till next week the pigskin pickin’ pooch and I remain your humble servants in selecting SEC teams that will slide onto the losers list. Have a great week watching the best football in the country.

Larry is an award winning writer whose work has appeared in almost every college football venue. Now he primarily writes for Touchdown Alabama Magazine. This series of “Larry’s Losers” is a tribute to an old Southern favorite of my youth, “Leanord’s Losers”. Follow Larry on Twitter at https://twitter.com/LBSportswriter


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